Tag: hookup

Special interest

I picked up a Cosmopolitan magazine that was laying around and read through about four articles. In between the articles were advertisements targeted to mostly young women I would assume in their teens to late twenties. Some articles referred to older women as “OGs” and young readers as “Newbies.” As this was my first time intently reading the magazine I was surprised at the amount of profanity used by the writers.

OK, I’m old. Maybe also lame. Maybe prudish but when I read something other than Fader, Vibe, Source or High Times magazine I don’t expect to read so much profanity. Terms such as OG I understand are taken from gangster culture in order to make reading seem cooler or at least as cool as the raunchy content on social media. All the profanity and acronyms show an attempt by the editors to gain the young crowd. Which understandably is where the money is, as the youth make up a large market.

Back to the ads and articles. I read a little big of Iggy Azaleas article, as I did enjoy her music and found it unjust how people treated her. Her article indicated that she wasn’t able to deal with the pressure of her fame and needed time to learn how to handle life(Justin Beiber recently said the same). She then went on to say she hopes to be with her current rapper boyfriend ten years from now and have some children, but marriage is not required. From a economic standpoint marriage is not in her favor(see Wendy Williams, Hallie Berry, Aisha Taylor). At her current net worth of only approximately 6 million, she doesn’t have much money to spare for an international celebrity. Her bf(7 years her junior) lyrics include the typical Cosmopolitan profanity with added, b*tch, thot, n-word, celebration of drug use and murder. Its art alright, right? So I don’t expect that 10 years of longevity. Hopefully the young ladies reading don’t believe they will have a happy Will & Jada happy(recently revealed not so happy) ending. Then again Will Smith prided himself on being the rapper who never used profanity, might explain the longevity of his marriage, go figure.

I went off track on Iggy as I like her material. So the articles were about legitimizing hookup culture, different sexual exploration and the ads were cosmetics and birth control. All those things go hand in hand. You get into a unsustainable relationship with a drug using bad boy, you get on birth control(as he will not take precaution), have eccentric sex, break up now you need makeup for your next date, that doesn’t work out so you have to buy another Cosmo for further instruction.

Ultimately Cosmo is out to help Cosmo and its advertisers generate more money. Buy more pills and makeup and Cosmo until you are so jaded and reach the age where you start to use empirical date from bad experiences.

If Cosmo’s intent was to help, they would give warnings that hookup culture will ultimately give you more depression because it is not sustainable. As progressive, liberated, empowered and tough you may believe you are, there is a point where you will interpret the hook-up situationship as exploiting on your side. There will be misunderstanding and without a structure or guidelines there is nothing to keep the situationship together. If there was then that would be a relationship.

I understand that we are in the information age and the on-demand age, etc. I get it, but we are still 75% water, carbon based creatures with some would say a spiritual being, and definitely a ego. Your ego if it is big enough to have sustained you to an autonomous adulthood will not allow you to stay in a situationship for long. I would say long is past 2 years. I am willing to retract that if I knew otherwise. I don’t believe there is enough data to dispute my claim as pride prevents people from sharing this info. We generally have a feeling hookup culture and situationships are on the rise but give me the numbers on a graph.

Cosmo is a corporation and a corporation’s number one responsibility is to make profit for their shareholders. The company is not a charity or a non profit. If profits can be generated from increasing entropy, from increasing loneliness, anxiety, depression, fear, then they will capitalize upon it. I repeatedly discuss friends who are bad influences. People who are bad influences, and from recent news we find that legally corporations are people. So we have to be mindful of the human people and the legal people we associate with.

Satisfaction not guaranteed

Only recently I have been purchasing strawberries that are USDA organic non-gmo. They are always tasty compared to the strawberries I ate when I was a child and GMO and Organic were not in my vocabulary. The strawberries I remembered as a youth had not sweetness and I wondered why everyone raved about strawberries. I had a similar experience with watermelons. Nowadays the farmers seem to have found their mojo. They are consistently producing sweet fruits. They have it down to a science. Still once in a while I will purchase a box of strawberries usually the non-organic ones, and they will have no taste just as the ones of my childhood.

I am not a health nut, nor a organic, non-GMO cult member but I would prefer not to eat the pesticides if you may be so kind.

Looking at a strawberry for me conveyed no great enthusiasm due to my varied past regarding their taste. Satisfaction was not directly related to a strawberry in my brain. Similarly, sex does not equal satisfaction for most women. This makes it strange that there is a prevalence of hook-up culture in popular media. Maybe my social circle is prudish(not) but I think the media blows this population way out of proportion.

I don’t want to digress but I have a big issue with the way media trivialized the free love and women’s liberation movement of the 1970s. It wasn’t just about not wearing a bra, using drugs, and marijuana and concerts and sex. The majority of people were living conventional square lifestyles or at least pretending to do so. Also the youth of the 1907s were seeking to have a purpose, seeking spiritual awakening, greater understanding, intellectual growth, international scope.

I guess the sub-culture population practicing free love and drug use were inspired by the stories they heard of the roaring 1920s. 1920s, 1970s, 2020s and we are preparing the next group in 2070s.

Back to the topic though-again I despise apps. The hookup culture has no sustainable benefit. Why get all sweaty, dehydrated and mess up your hair for something that is not guaranteed. A better investment in my opinion is to consider a person as a whole and take the time to investigate all they have to offer. Sex is important(very) but sex is maybe I’m guessing 0.0001% of our time alive(totally unscientific). The rest of your time is spent sleeping, at work, eating, on your phone, using the bathroom, I guess.

You cant start a relationship with a hookup. Real life is not the movies. Real life is not a snapshot of a subgroup in the 1920s or 1970s. Real life is a mush longer story. So since sexual satisfaction is not guaranteed and sex is only part of 0.0001% of life, you have to connect on the other levels.