Author: showent

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Where NOT to find a man

I have been binge watching “Scam City” on Netflix. I fully enjoy films about manipulative and horrible people. We all deal with con artists every day on different levels.

One of the places that you definitely do not want to find a mate is on vacation. Not only because it may be a scam but also the person does not live in your geographic area and long distance relationships flat out do not work. So in addition to vacation spots I have compiled the following places:

Night Clubs
Bars
Workplace
Free dating apps
Facebook
Instagram
Snapchat
Anywhere between the hours of 10PM and 6AM
Carnivals(The raunchy kind)
Parades(See above)
Casinos
While they are with a group(even a group of only 2)

On the other end of the spectrum the following are good places to meet someone,  but not absolute, as some players have the discipline and patience to function efficiently in any environment. Here are the list of good places:

Libraries
Book fairs/clubs
Electronics Stores
Parks
National Monuments
Museums
Gardens
Catholic Church
Jewish Synagogue

Discernment has to be exercised at all times. Please refer to my post about the properties of a good man. Remember, no tattoos, cant dance, submits to authority(i should have had this in there), shy. If you want a mate remember you may have to make the first step in an inconspicuous way ofcourse.

Simple Simon

Simple Simon is a somewhat derogatory name given to someone viewed as having lower intelligence. See the movie Tropic Thunder for an exaggerated visual, in the character of Simple Jack. Or see Forrest Gump for a sightly less exaggerated visual.

One thing that was a recurring theme in the movie Forrest Gump was his devotion to Jenny. Jenny was damaged in almost every way possible but Forrest could never see her flaws. Aside from his what I would call autism, Forrest was hard working, moral, talented, super strong and kind. He may not have had the best social skills but the beauty of his goodness overshadowed his intellectual limitations and earned him the love, respect and recognition of the whole country. Jenny meanwhile found him very silly and missed out on the sustainable life she could have enjoyed with Forrest.

I reference the fictional movie to illustrate the recurring story of good girls attraction to bad guys. Due to Jenny’s attraction to bad guys she was abused, made a single mother, introduced to drugs and eventually killed by HIV/AIDS. Bad guys, while exciting at the end of the day cannot deviate from their nature.

To be brief we are all attracted to rebellious behavior and repulsed by discipline. Even when discipline will get us everything we want in a long term and sustainable way, we will throw it away due to short cited emotional decisions.

It is highly unlikely that you will find a Forest Gump. There are many men on the high functioning end of Autism that would make a great candidate for a partner. It would take a lot of skill to determine if their spectrum of autism will be tolerable. So I am going to propose some very crass and offensive(post 2017) qualities that will allow you to select a man that will be faithful, a provider and subject to your whims.

The list of qualities/attributes are as follows:
-Autistic
-Speech impediment
-Physical deformity or disability
-Deceased mother
-Never knew his mother
-Virgin
-High moral conviction
-No tattoos
-Cant dance
-Drinks beer but not mixed drinks
-Doesn’t question authority
-Patriotic
-Sports fan
-Shy
-Helpful
-Loves animals
-Plays fantasy sports
-Watches sports
-Cannot dress
-College graduate
-Degree in science
-Degree in mathematics
-Degree in physics
-Respects his parents
-Does not watch pornography(this may be impossible)

None of the above are absolutes. Also too many of these should not be combined or you would end up with a vegetable. The above man will most likely not be very physically fit due to the beers and staying at home but he is loyal and in for the long haul.

Each situation is different and it takes time to find out all of someone’s nuances. It also will be required for you to pursue him. He will be too timid/shy to pursue you.

Nothing to lose but your loneliness

Cat ladies of the world unite. You have nothing to lose but your loneliness. There are a lot of good guys. Unfortunately many have become corrupted by pornography, misogyny, and a host of other social afflictions resulting from them projecting their lack of luck with the ladies on others.

If you catch one of these guys before they become a mass shooter or extremist you can possibly tame him. The thing you cannot do when you get into a relationship with him is give him too much of a hard time or too much confidence. Just the right balance of encouragement and discouragement will get you that long term friend. Preventing him from being influenced or corrupted by consumerism is very important. You yourself will have to restrict yourself from the mas consumption and trend following.

I say this because there are parallels with upgrading to the next shiny gadget and him upgrading to the next woman. If you practice a lifestyle of being satisfied with something that works and he also follows the same lifestyle, then he will not think to upgrade to the next model when the opportunity arises.

Consumerism, following trends, materialism, bad-credit, social-media and all that is associated with the aforementioned are your relationship’s enemy. You have to discipline yourself to get to your goal.